You can develop healthy habits (of thinking, feeling, communication, etc.) that impact your family for generations.

About a week ago, my oldest daughter (20 years old at the time of this writing) and my wife were talking, and my daughter said something along this line…

It’s hard to express what a blessing it was to overhear those words coming from that particular daughter. Why? Because when she was young (around 2 or 3 years old), she was a very moody child. We found ourselves in a constant battle with her emotions. In the years that followed, we had to consistently guide her out of those moody spells when they came around again. But look at how she views it now. She calls herself “transformed.”

There are 2 POWERFUL points she made…

1 Her parents didn’t allow her emotions to control her.

The way I phrased that is important. Her parents DIDN’T ALLOW it. Many parents believe a flawed kind of logic that goes something like this…

“I can’t control how my children feel. So, I have to try to understand them, empathize with what they’re feeling, and ride out the storm.”

As happened in my daughter’s case, the feelings will lose their power as they live according to the truth. In our experience, moodiness was nothing more than the power of sin seeking to dominate her… and we weren’t going to allow it to happen that way.

An example: 

Often, when that daughter woke from naps, she was “mad at the world.” Her eyebrows hung low over her eyes and you could feel the negative vibes emanating from her little body. Her responses to others during that “waking up” stage were snappy and even rude.

We determined that such behavior was unloving, did not bring glory to Christ, and would therefore, not be allowed. So, we talked with her about the issue, explaining what we saw, what it was (sinful), and that we would not allow it. We even told her what the consequences would be if she treated others that way again.

Then, we went to war. Literally, the three of us went to war against the tyranny of her emotions. For us parents, consistency and determination were key. We were not going to allow our daughter to grow up into an emotionally controlled young woman.

And from her own mouth, we hear that she feels her life is changed, for the better, because we didn’t allow it.

2 She was made to respond according to what was true

An example:

Every time our dear daughter woke and came out of her room with a bad attitude, we’d remind her what we’d talked about, and require her to go back to her room, ask Jesus for help to love people as she should, and try again. Sometimes she needed our help in knowing how to do those things (especially when she was young). Eventually, she’d do it on her own, and might even be in her room a long while before she was ready to come out again.

But finally, with lots of time and consistency, she began to gain the victory over the power of sinful emotions. The moody attitude when first coming from her room after a nap decreased in frequency, until finally, she was relatively free of it.

This was all just the “training ground” for when she finally placed her faith in Christ. Then the Holy Spirit came online and she really began to make progress.

Healthy habits have a long term (even eternal) impact

There are quite a few ways I see that our daughter’s freedom from the dominance of emotion will carry into the future…

And THAT is where the generational impact comes in.

Her children, and their children, and the children come after them, will all benefit from the incredible gift of healthy emotional habits that has been given to our daughter.

Do you see how important your parental role is? You are not just raising “well adjusted, productive citizens.” You’re shaping souls for the glory of God.

You’re enabling children to walk by the Spirit through wise, consistent instruction and discipline.

You can impact generations through your consistency now. And that, can change the world!

Here’s a fun video from a crazy group that highlights the attitude and irritation that comes from a person who is emotionally (selfishly) controlled. If you need the lyrics, you can look below the video. The song is called “Drama Queen” – the group is Family Force 5.

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