How to be a good father…
It’s not an easy question to answer.
A while back I asked readers of this blog to answer this question:
If you could get a direct answer from God about any question related to marriage, the family, and parenting – what would it be?
I got some very good responses.
One Dad asked,
“How would You have me become a better father?”
It’s a question worth asking.
I hesitate to answer FOR God on any question, but I feel pretty safe offering these thoughts because they come directly from His word:
First let me say that I don’t know the exact circumstances or spiritual condition of the man who asked, so this list will be general in nature.
And know this too: these points come from the heart of man who wants to be a good Dad too, and is still very much in process.
How God would have you be a better Dad:
- Be humble – that means admitting your failures to your kids when needed and asking for their forgiveness
- Be honest – Don’t hide your own insecurities and fears. Your kids need to know how to deal with their own and your example will serve them well.
- Love God – It should go without saying but it doesn’t. Your kids need to know that your devotion to God is deeper than words.
- Love their mom – Your kids will learn about marriage most from the example you set. Set an example of self-sacrifice for the sake of your bride.
- Treat them as people, not slaves – Show them how to consider others by the way you consider and care for them.
- Value their ideas and input – God will teach you through your children and build them up at the same time. Let Him.
- Teach them God’s word – Do it in a way that shows that you honor what is being said. Give them examples of how you’ve applied it in your life. Teach them what its application looks like in their life.
- Hold them accountable – If you set godly rules for your home, enforce them. Children become insecure when there are not consistent, loving boundaries.
- Discipline them as needed – The scriptures say that you really hate your child if you don’t discipline them. They need it. Boundaries are the issue here, too.
- Be kind – Harshness is one of the main ways to exasperate your child. Even when they are wrong or sinful, they need your kindness. You’re prone to sin, too. Don’t forget that.
- Control your anger – The anger of God does not accomplish the plans of God. Take this seriously. If you have anger issues, get help. Now.