The Proverbs 31 woman has become proverbial…
…at least in Christian circles.
What I mean is that “she” (Proverbs 31:10-31) has become a common reference to womanhood and being a wife and mother.
And because she’s an object of such great focus, some women feel overwhelmed when they compare their lives to hers.
That’s because she’s a pretty high standard to live up to.
Some common attitudes…
- I’ve known of some women who become so paralyzed by her sterling example that they give up trying.
- Others strive and strive and strive to live up to what they believe her to represent, and collapse in exhaustion.
- Still others see her as “too idealistic” for anyone to become, so they don’t give her any serious consideration.
In the end, none of the 3 leads a woman closer to godly womanhood…
because all 3 are ignoring a fundamental truth that makes the impossibilities of scripture possible.
So what should we do with the Proverbs 31 woman?
Though I’m not a woman, I find the same difficulty to exist for me.
Not in regard to Proverbs 31, but in regard to ALL of scripture.
Consider these few that are equally overwhelming…
Ephesians chapter 5, verse 25 – Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her…
Philippians chapter 2, verse 2 – Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.
Luke chapter 14, verse 26 – If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple.
Matthew chapter 5, verse 48 – You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.
What do we do with such “impossible” sounding passages (Proverbs 31 among them)?
We should NOT:
- Give up
- Work overtime, or
- Disregard them.
We should:
- remember it is God who wills and works in us for His good pleasure (Philippians 2:14).
- live by faith in the Son of God, not in our own efforts (Galatians 2:20).
- value the “ideals” set forth in the word of God (2 Timothy 3:16).
These are the truths of our NEW LIFE… and they apply to us no matter our gender or role in life.
Knowing who we are in Christ, and what He has done to empower us delivers us from the…
- give up,
- work hard and fail,
- dismiss his commands as “impossible”
attitudes.
The “ideals” of the Proverbs 31 woman are not the issue… the indwelling of Christ is.
Receiving the grace of God that makes us a new creation, gives us the power to become what He is commanding.
Do you KNOW… really KNOW what He’s done for you?
Do you grasp the reality of Christ living in you, and THROUGH you?
Tell me about YOUR experience of Christ’s life expressed through yours in the comments below!
by 
I really love this post. Especially your statement . . . “The ideals of the Proverbs 31 woman are not the issue . . . the indwelling of Christ is.” Wish more people understood this truth. God is so good to empower & transform us through the indwelling of His Holy Spirit.
Lisa B Thanks so much for your comment. It is encouraging to me. As I got into the writing the post took a turn in that direction that I didn’t expect… and I”m so glad for it. I love how the LORD reveals stuff to us as we go. Keeps me humble…
I so agree with you! The Lord is the one who works in us. Thank goodness we can be holy like he is because Jesus makes us so. I forget so often and find myself striving to be that “perfect” Christian woman. It’s also good to know that we all feel that pressure, not only women. Thanks for the reminder and insight.
LauraBennet Thanks for joining the conversation! It really is all about Jesus – not matter the area of concern. In parenting/marriage/home life it’s so easy to forget that we need Him like we need oxygen.
LauraBennet Thanks for joining the conversation! It really is all about Jesus – not matter the area of concern. In parenting/marriage/home life it’s so easy to forget that we need Him like we need oxygen.
Hard to tell by my name, but I’m a guy. The beard gives it away, though 🙂 So I’m aware that I may be missing some street cred in the eyes of many when I talk about Proverbs 31. But I think sometimes we miss a big part of the point of Proverbs 31.
I agree with you that the indwelling of Christ and the woman’s heart attitude is what’s important, but I also think it’s important that we pay attention to HOW that is manifested in Proverbs 31. Think of it like this: When Jesus says “Blessed are the peacemakers” or “Blessed are the merciful,” the important part is the indwelling of Christ. But yet, Christ is very specific about how that indwelling will be manifested – being merciful and being a peacemaker.
I think that’s where many fall short when they talk about Proverbs 31. They talk about the attitude and the heart, and they end up never really addressing the elephant in the room, which is that the character of the wife turned her into a hard-working, hustling, ambitious, selfless woman who wakes up early and works hard to bless others.
Loren Pinilis Great point Loren… the outcome is what demonstrates the heart.
Sometimes our quest for “perfection” gets in the way of true perfection. That’s something that took me years to learn — and that I still need frequent reminders of. It is difficult to explain in words, really, but in time the Spirit makes it quite clear. I am so thankful He takes us as we are and leads us step by step to higher ground!
@Sheila Edeliant yes, as someone once said, “He loves us just the way we are, but loves us too much to leave us that way.”
I think there’s
more to the Proverbs 31 woman than people initially realize when just
reading the passage. I’ve incidentally been reading a new book by Dr. Tony
Evans and his daughter, Chrystal Evans Hurst called “Kingdom
Woman” that has given me new insights. Right off the bat they talk
about the Proverbs 31 woman being the hallmark of kingdom women, “But
the Proverbs 31 woman is not the model of a perfect woman. Neither is a kingdom
woman called to perfection. Women, you can be a Proverbs 31 woman and more
– but that doesn’t mean you do it all at the same time.” They
talk about life flowing through seasons and about getting help, not trying
to do it all. It’s really eye-opening. If you’re interested in Dr. Evan’s book,
they have information and even free devotional downloads at
kingdomwomanbook.com. I hope it blesses you as it has blessed me.